I wish I'd understood.

I wish someone, anyone would have reached out to me at some point in my childhood to say "It's okay. No, really. It's okay to have the differences. It's okay to have the conflicts."

My life might have turned out a bit differently.

"False Peace: How to Reject the Lie of Sameness, Embrace Difference, and Embody True Unity" is my second literary adventure with mom, wife, social worker, Bible teacher, and local pastor Pricelis Perreaux-Dominguez.

Oh, and yeah, she's an author.

"Being a Sanctuary" was was my first journey with Perreaux-Dominguez, a book that really lit my fire for being rather than simply finding a safer church.

My experience is now similar with "False Peace," a book that calls us to embrace our discomfort and set aside the false peace we so often embrace which is really just a timid commitment of sorts toward silence, sameness, and a unity that skims the surface while allowing division to bubble underneath the surface of our faith and our relationships.

In my own experiences, those I remember so vividly from my young adult years, it's also a realization that what I mistook for insurmountable conflict was often a fear of difference and a fear of the disagreements that can rise when we're living more deeply and more authentically. Having grown up in an environment with domestic violence, I learned early on that any conflict was bad conflict and destined to lead to even greater, and potentially violent, conflict.

So, when a disagreement would rise I'd be like "I'm out."

I was always out.

Relationship conflict? Out. Church conflict? Out. Friendship conflict? Out. Work conflict? Out.

So many wasted departures. And sure, some may have been truly inevitable. Yet, in my heart I know that many were not.

Over time, as I grew out of those abusive cycles and started healthier ones I began to realize that uniformity and sameness were not synonymous with oneness and that I could live more like Jesus did by learning how to embody true unity. In reality, leaning into embracing difference became a way to foster true belonging.

Contemporary Christianity far too often has sown the seeds of division by shallow forms of unity rooted in colonialism, assimilation, and our constant search for the next comfortable place and people for our lives.

As an adult with significant disabilities, I can assure you I've never been one of those comfortable people.

Along the way in "False Peace," Perreaux-Dominguez deep dives into her own honesty, transparencies, vulnerabilities, and humilities. She and I don't always agree, at least not theologically, yet I have a feeling I'd find her absolutely mesmerizing and her ministry work is extraordinary.

Have we forgotten how to embrace the differences without the extremist name-calling, labels, assumptions, perceptions and so forth?

Look around.

Yes, we have. Yes, I have.

And yet, as someone who has been othered for nearly all of my life there's so much within the pages of "False Peace" that resonates. There's so much here that feels like Christ, feels like God's heart, and feels like the kind of mutuality and love that I want to live into.

The world is so often in fractured and divided. Yet, we don't have to be. We can learn to embrace oneness, again not sameness, and we can be the sanctuary we so much need and be the changemakers and bridge-builders of the world.

We can sit down with each other to break bread and to actively listen even when we know there are areas where we disagree.

"False Peace" leans into all of these things, not to erase our differences but to transform our faith and our lives. "False Peace" includes, along with Perreaux-Dominguez's insights and wisdom, discussion questions to enhance the reading, prayers to deepen the spiritual journey, and both Biblical and cultural quotes that often left me in tears.

"False Peace" is for those ready to transform the life of sameness and to live a more fully immersed life of faith and unity.

Count me in.

Written by Richard Propes
The Independent Critic