It pains me to say this, but if you actually liked Valentine's Day then there's a pretty darn good chance that you'll find yourself enjoying New Year's Eve, another excuse for gathering a slew of Hollywood stars whose roles are underwritten or non-existent and having them wax with faux eloquently and obsessively about the importance of New Year's Eve, which I'm sure does actually hold more importance in Times Square than it does on the Circle in downtown Indianapolis.

Truth be told, I struggled with following the film - not because it was complex, but because the complete and utter silliness of it all kept me chuckling and distracted. While director Catherine Hardwicke has proven she can handle intense, weighty material (Thirteen), she's also proven that she can't (Twilight, The Nativity Story). Here, Hardwicke goes from mismanaging the material to turning it into a cinematic junkyard.

Director Dominic Sena (Gone in 60 Seconds, Whiteout) will hopefully be knocked out by the three strikes rule. What little appealing action there is in the film exists in the final scene, practically the only place where anything resembling a decent special effect exists. The film's CGI is disgustingly weak and unconvincing, while Amir M. Mokri's camera work is convoluted and unimaginative.

Occasionally, you'll hear my fellow critics in the Indiana Film Journalists Association lamenting 20th Century Fox's rather shabby treatment of the Hoosier state in terms of promos and movie screenings. While there's no denying that Fox still considers Indy a lesser market, the real problem may be that Fox keeps producing low-quality cinematic crap like this film that simply isn't worth marketing.

Apollo 18 is a lazily made film, a film that projects itself to be yet the latest in the "found footage" sub-genre in the realm of the thriller/horror world. However, director Gonzalo Lopez-Gallego never comes close to selling the whole "found footage" concept and Apollo 18 is only disturbing in how completely and utterly lacking it is in terms of chills, thrills or, for that matter, anything remotely interesting.

With Jack & Jill, it's hard not to picture Adam Sandler sitting down and writing a letter to the folks at the Razzie Awards and saying "I haven't been nominated for awhile, so I thought I'd make a film called Jack & Jill where I play both parts and remind you just how much more convincing Eddie Murphy AND Martin Lawrence are in drag."

Designed exclusively for the purpose of trying to trigger a post-Twilight existence for Lautner, Abduction instead serves as a reminder of how incredibly lucky an actor can be when the right part comes along and turns them undeservedly into a household name. We can only hope that once his Twilight years are history that some goons from Bollywood abduct Lautner and America won't be subjected to anymore of this creatively vacant drivel.

Have you ever gone to a movie that was just a Smurfin' waste of time? Where you were just Smurfin' ripped off? Where you felt like you'd been bent over and Smurfed really, really hard without a condom?

The only thing worse than watching an episode of the televised Smurfs is having to sit through director Raja Gosnell's latest animated disaster, the big screen version of The Smurfs. In 3-D. No, really.

There's no question that when Danny McBride decided to salvage this script from his college days, he and his buddies from the North Carolina School of the Arts likely imagined a wondrously funny an irreverent production along the lines of a Monty Python flick or Mel Brooks' Robin Hood: Men in Tights.

Unfortunately, Your Highness is much closer to Krull or any number of other bad 70's and 80's faux period comedies than it is any of the comedy classics from Brooks or Monty Python.

This pre-planned follow-up to the surprise hit, I'll let you guess the title, is more graphic yet less scary and involves an infinitely more grotesque yet less interesting villain. It's also the worst film of 2011 - and that's saying quite a bit.